How To Bounce Back From Adversity: The power of resilience and developing it in our lives.
Oh my, do you know how to bounce back? And bounce back harder! Yup, you do! Resilience is the ability to bounce back from a setback, adversity, or stressful situation, learn from the experience, and grow from it. Many of my clients have this personal resource in their personality and toolbox of coping skills. They would not have gotten to where they’ve gotten without the ability to bounce back, and we invent ourselves. This is a pretty badass skill. And you have this ability inside you! Our resilience has been tested during COVID and all the hardships we all had to face.
The human spirit is one of the most wonderful things – the ability to pull ourselves out of the deepest pits and pain and rise above. It's the one thing we all have in common; we're all human and, therefore, all resilient. In fact, our resilience is so strong that it can be used as a form of healing. There are countless examples of people who have suffered horrific accidents, disabilities, abuse, or gender-based violence but never give up. Years later, they're doing amazing things with their lives – contributing to their communities and making changes in communities that need it most.
“Hope is being able to see that there is light despite all of the darkness.”
When we're faced with a setback, it can be easy to give up and quit. But what if we saw the same event as an opportunity for growth? What if we saw our setbacks as a chance to strengthen our resolve and grow as individuals?
The truth is, resilience is something that we all possess. It's part of our DNA—it's in our very nature to bounce back from adversity. And when it comes down to it, resilience isn't just about coming out on top—it's about accepting failure and moving forward with grace. After all, our greatest lessons come from our most challenging experiences.
Now that we’ve established, you have this ability. Sometimes we use our resilience at work or other areas of our lives-motherhood, relationships, and creative endeavors. We know how to bounce back, create a new way of being, re-invent ourselves, and re-imagine a project or something to be efficient, which is fantastic.
However, often, my clients struggle with applying this to their inner life and making the changes that would feed and nourish their souls. What would happen if you turn that resilience resource onto yourself and know that you would ability to bounce back against any sit back or changes that you might encounter as you live the life that genuinely feels fulfilling and nourishing to you?
So many of my clients come to therapy when they have given all their bounce back to outside things such as work-family children, and other friendships. But feel nervous and afraid because they don’t know how to apply themselves. In therapy, clients can build the necessary skills like setting boundaries with essential people in their life, people to learn self-care skills, self-love, and learn how and slowly turn all these unique qualities that they’ve used on the outside to turn a little bit of it to the inside so they can live that fulfilling whole life that you know is in your heart. The supportive relationship provides you with an opportunity to have a non-judgemental space, feel heard, and seen, be vulnerable, experience, express anger, and whatever emotion is coming up for you. In a supportive relationship, you get to experiment and play with other parts of yourself that I support and guide you to integrate into your life. You do not have to shoulder this alone. I’m here to help.
So how do you use your own resilience as a form of healing? Here are some ideas:
Travel back to your past and think of a time you were faced with a challenge and how did you get through it? What would you like to do different so that you can have more balance?
Pay attention to what triggers your emotions and triggers feelings of frustration or anger in yourself or others around you. These are often times when you need to take a step back and reevaluate the situation at hand before it gets out of hand!
Take care of yourself by eating well and exercising regularly so that your body can recover faster from any physical or emotional injuries that might occur along the way!
Get enough sleep so that your mind can rest while your body recovers from whatever challenge has thrown its way.
Once we have insight about resilience and its power, we can start to utilize it. We can see how useful it is whenever setbacks happen in life. We can use our natural resilience instead of being beaten down by life. Resilience is a powerful tool that many people underutilize. Instead of being passive, resilient people decide to do something positive in response to every negative life event that they are faced with. If you are going through a difficult time, remind yourself that you are resilient and understand that you will bounce back from this setback just as well as you have bounced back from others. Then take action on doing something proactive about it. Although it may not seem like a long-lasting solution now, you will feel better as soon as your action plans unfold. Your lifestyle will return to a more balanced state, which will help make you feel more resilient overall and even happier when facing future challenges.
